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Fierce and Freaked

The moment my parents first left me alone in my dorm room to live without them was not as joyful as I thought it was going to be. For months –  scratch that, years, I had been waiting for the day I would leave home and start a new chapter in my life, one without my parent’s rules, free to make my own decisions. Despite this, the moment they closed the door and headed back home, I felt panicked. And that’s where everything begins.

bear-673665_960_720My name is Melissa and I am a Junior at UAlbany. I’m still not sure what I want to do when I leave here and that’s okay. It took me a really long time to realize that it was okay. I am a really social person, something that has changed drastically since high school, so think I’d like to do something where I can talk a lot but that’s about as much of a clue as I have. I have a serious case of wanderlust and dream of traveling the world throughout my whole life. I want to see the most beautiful and exotic places in the world in person and capture that moment with a picture, to always look back and reflect on. I love kittens and anything artsy. I like to paint, write and read. I love to meet new people, eat new food (seriously wish I could dine out every night) and try new things. My biggest goal in life is to be happy with who I am and what I’m doing.

When I first came to college I was a completely different person than who I am now. I grew more as a person in my first year at UAlbany than in all four years in high school. I struggled a lot over these past 2 years and have learned immensely about myself from my experiences. I want to write this blog for people who feel like there falling apart or who feel like everything is just too overwhelming. It’s hard to adjust to life in a new place especially going into it alone. I’m writing this blog to let you know you’re not alone, everyone has been through those moments where you feel like you’re not in control. I want to share how to keep it together, how to be fierce when you feel freaked.


melissa-ferringMelissa F.
Class of 2018
Majors: Spanish & Communication
Blog Theme: Fierce & Freaked

Please Note: The views of our student bloggers do not necessarily reflect the views of the UAlbany Advisement Services Center. These are their stories and their voices.

Welcome to (young) Adulthood

Freedom is a beautiful thing. It can also be a dangerous thing. Growing up in my household could be suffocating at times. My dad is a hard worker who, because of his job, has seen what real dangers exist in the world, dangers a teenage girl like me never take seriously. Because of this my dad was very protective of me and my siblings, tracking our phones and constantly checking in on us. It made him hard to talk to when all it seemed like he was doing was ruining my fun. My mom went along with whatever my dad decided, often acting as the enforcer of my dad’s rules. It made it hard to experience anything and it definitely made me naïve. Continue reading “Welcome to (young) Adulthood”

Don’t be a Dormmat

There are not many times in your life where you will be living in a dorm room. It’s definitely an experience I miss sometimes since moving into my first apartment this year. The environment of living in a dorm room and hall is like nothing I’ve experienced before in my life. Ever since I found out what college was, I dreamed about living in a dorm. I dreamed of how I would decorate my side,and late nights with my roommate watching movies and doing our nails. I had seen movies and dorm life seemed amazing. Throughout high school, the older I got, the more disgruntled I became living in my house with my parents. I wanted to escape off to college and when the time finally came I couldn’t have been more excited. I finally went shopping for my dream dorm, picking out lamps and comforters after years of thinking about it. I guess my excitement blinded me from the fact that I never lived with another person before. Sure, I lived with my family in our house but I still had my own room, my own sanctuary. I would be sharing a living space with another person and at the time I didn’t realize how much time I would be spending with that person. I took those small moments of solitude in my room for granted and realized it only once my excitement died down. Continue reading “Don’t be a Dormmat”

From Zero Point Five to Hero

Zero to hero 1.jpg

All throughout high school I would have considered myself a certified slacker. Procrastination is one of my biggest weaknesses and is something I have struggled with my whole schooling career, including now. The idea of doing school work days before it was due didn’t appeal to me much especially if there was something better I could be doing with my time. The ticking hours before a deadline was my motivation to power through an assignment or study for a test. In spite of this, I wasn’t always handing in quality work, rushing to finish in time. I knew I could do better if I tried, but my laziness pulled me into doing the bare minimum. Due to my good memory and test taking skills I was able to slide by in high school despite missing home works and handing in assignments late. I often think that if I had put the effort into my high school classes that I put into my work now, I would be going to Harvard. One of the biggest challenges a student experiences when transitioning into college is the work load. Continue reading “From Zero Point Five to Hero”

Tales from a Careful, Carless Commuter

     With each year that passes I look back and I can see how much I’ve grown as a person. My slow transformation into adulthood took a huge step this year when I decided to rent my first apartment with four of my close girl friends. Having lived on campus for two years prior, I was excited to see what this new living environment would bring. Our 5-bedroom apartment is on the second floor of an old townhouse, and right in the middle of downtown life. Little bodegas litter the street I live on and I get to call an old brick coffee house my next door neighbor. The neighborhood is a mixture of college students and people who live there all year round. You may have a frat house on one side of you and a family of five on the other. The clash of the different cultures is very prevalent yet we all coexist together peacefully. One of my biggest concerns when moving into my apartment was my safety. I just spent all this time living in this monitored, super safe bubble that is campus housing and now I’m suddenly walking the streets of Albany alone just to get home. With all the dangers that lurk in the neighborhood I live in, I try to be as smart and safe as possible. Despite all this, it’s still amazing to have a place to call my own. There’s a lot more responsibility that come with having an apartment but my housemates and I have been up for the challenge and there’s honestly no better feeling than being able to share a space with my best friends.   Continue reading “Tales from a Careful, Carless Commuter”

The Minor Problem with Picking a Major

So here’s the deal. You graduate high school and go to college for 4 years, studying so that you can get the degree of your choice, so that you can get a job with that degree, so that you can provide for yourself and the family you’ll eventually have and so that one day you can send your kids to college. It’s the circle of life, how beautiful. Not. Not for me at least. You see I unfortunately wasn’t blessed with knowing exactly what I want to do with my life. There are some people, actually many people who come into college fully aware of what path they want to take in. This benefits them in many ways, the biggest being that they are able to plan. Plan what classes to take, what grad schools to look into, what internships to apply for. Continue reading “The Minor Problem with Picking a Major”

It’s Sick Being Sick

     My inspiration for my blog this week came from my garbage can that’s overflowing with tissues as well as empty bags of cough drops that sit on my night stand. Yes, as Albany temperatures continue to drop, the number of sick students has risen drastically. It’s bound to happen with so many people sharing the same area, whether it be the dorms, the bathrooms, or even the bus. The germs have come out to play. To say I hate this time of year is an understatement, as I have without fail, gotten sick every year I’ve been here. The worst part about getting sick in college is the longevity of the sickness, as it never seems to truly go away for weeks. The number of people spreading different sicknesses sweeps through the whole campus and also everybody gets a taste of it. One year I came down with strep throat and when that finally cleared up I got a sinus infection. I couldn’t catch a break back then and still can’t now as I spent my weekend permanently glued to my bed. Continue reading “It’s Sick Being Sick”

Explore outside UAlbany’s Door

With the size and amount of people at UAlbany, it’s sometimes easy to forget that there is a world out side of it. Campus has so much to offer and there is always something to do at some point in the day. Over 20,000 students attend this school and at times it can seem that UAlbany is its own bustling city separate from Albany its self. As a freshman the only time I stepped foot off campus was for that rare trip to Crossgates or Walmart, both which by bus take less than 5 minutes to reach. It wasn’t until sophomore year that I realized where I was actually living, and that my world wasn’t just limited to campus. If you have the time, patience, and means of transportation, you will be able to discover what this city has to offer you. Continue reading “Explore outside UAlbany’s Door”

The New You

Let me tell you a little bit about myself. I want to see the world. I want to be able to meet a million people at all corners of the earth and learn their stories. I want to learn to speak different languages and I want to experience other people’s culture. I guess that why I chose to be a Communications and Spanish major. I don’t know just yet what I’ll be doing to achieve my goal of seeing the world, but I’m sure I’ll figure it out. I also am the only girl in my family, growing up with 3 brothers. I got my first pet when I was 18 and his name is Chief and now I love cats, who knew. I love people, I love talking, and I love sharing my voice. It’s strange to think about the person I am now in comparison to the person I was all throughout high school. On the surface we look the same, and we sound the same but that’s about where the similarities stop as they are only skin deep. Continue reading “The New You”